Trichotillomania (Hair Pulling): When You Feel Unable to Stop Pulling Your Hair
Do you find yourself pulling at your hair without fully meaning to - only to realise afterwards how much you have pulled?
Perhaps you tell yourself you will stop, yet somehow find your hands returning to your scalp, eyebrows or eyelashes again and again.
You may feel embarrassed, frustrated or ashamed, wondering why you cannot simply “stop doing it.”
If this sounds familiar, please know this:
You are not alone, and this is far more common than people realise.
Trichotillomania, also known as hair pulling disorder, can feel incredibly distressing and isolating. Many people struggle in silence for years, hiding the behaviour and worrying that no one will understand.
But hair pulling is not about weakness, lack of willpower or “bad habits.”
It is a genuine anxiety-related condition - and support is available.
What Is Trichotillomania?
Trichotillomania is a condition involving a strong or irresistible urge to pull out hair.
Hair may be pulled from:
The scalp
Eyelashes
Eyebrows
Facial hair
Other areas of the body
For many people, the pulling happens automatically, especially during moments of stress, anxiety, boredom, overwhelm or deep concentration.
Others feel an intense build-up of tension or urge beforehand, followed by a brief sense of relief after pulling.
You may find yourself pulling while:
Watching television
Reading or studying
Working at your desk
Lying in bed
Feeling anxious, stressed or overwhelmed
Thinking deeply or concentrating
Feeling emotionally upset
Sometimes people do not even realise they are doing it until afterwards.
Does this sound familiar?
People struggling with trichotillomania often tell me:
“I don’t even realise I’m doing it.”
“I promise myself I’ll stop, but I can’t.”
“I feel ashamed about how I look.”
“I’m constantly trying to hide it.”
“I feel embarrassed if people notice.”
Over time, hair pulling can lead to:
Bald patches on the scalp
Missing or thinning eyebrows
Loss of eyelashes
Changes in confidence and self-esteem
Anxiety about appearance
Avoidance of social situations
Many people begin hiding the effects by wearing hats, changing hairstyles, using makeup, false eyelashes, eyebrow products or avoiding situations where others may notice.
Living with this can feel exhausting.
Why does hair pulling happen?
Hair pulling is often closely linked to anxiety, emotional overwhelm and self-soothing.
For many people, pulling temporarily relieves tension, stress, boredom or difficult emotions - even though afterwards there may be guilt, frustration or upset.
Trichotillomania is often grouped alongside obsessive-compulsive and related disorders, but for many people it feels less like a conscious choice and more like an automatic coping response.
It can affect children, teenagers and adults, regardless of gender, personality or background.
The important thing to understand is this:
You are not choosing this — and you are not failing.
When hair pulling starts affecting everyday life
You may notice yourself:
Feeling embarrassed about hair loss
Constantly checking mirrors
Avoiding windy weather, swimming or bright lighting
Feeling anxious people will notice
Pulling more during stressful periods
Feeling trapped in a cycle of pulling → regret → trying to stop → pulling again
Many people become stuck in harsh self-criticism, believing they “should” be able to stop - which often only increases stress and makes the cycle harder to break.
Treatment for Trichotillomania (hair pulling)
The good news is that hair pulling can be treated.
In my work, I help people gently understand and change the patterns that may be driving the urge to pull, while reducing anxiety, stress and emotional overwhelm.
The aim is not simply to rely on willpower or tell yourself to stop.
It is to help you feel calmer, more in control and less trapped by the behaviour.
Many people are surprised to discover that when the underlying emotional patterns begin to shift, the urge to pull can reduce significantly.
Imagine no longer feeling controlled by the urge, no longer hiding, and feeling more comfortable and confident in yourself again.
That kind of change is possible.
If trichotillomania is affecting your confidence, appearance, wellbeing or peace of mind, support is available.
You do not have to continue struggling with this on your own.
I successfully conduct sessions via Zoom, FaceTime, Messenger or WhatsApp so regardless of where you are in the world I can help you. All you need is an iPad, laptop or PC, a mobile phone and a good internet connection
If you would like to finally feel in control, calm and peaceful, please either email or call me on 0409 254 500 to arrange a free no obligation consultation. We can discuss your options and you will be able to get clear answers on any questions you may have. There is no obligation on either your part or mine!
I pulled my hair out due to anxiety for three years without being able to stop, no matter what I tried. Finally, I started talking with Liz and I found that in less than two months I was doing incredibly well. I have just reached five days without pulling my hair, something which I have not done in the whole three years. Not only has this goal been reached, but I no longer feel the need to pull my hair, and my anxiety is the lowest its ever been. GC
